Noah Law

You are contemplating booking your first counselling session, but don’t know what to anticipate? You’re not alone. For most, starting therapy feels like stepping into the unknown — but the truth is that your initial session is just a discussion designed to make you feel safe, heard, and understood.

Table of Contents

Most people feel more at ease after their first session of counselling.

Is It Common to Feel Anxious

Yes, definitely. Starting therapy is a big decision. Many people feel anxious, unsure, or even overwhelmed in the lead-up to their initial session. Don’t worry. A key part of your counsellor’s role is helping you feel at ease and welcomed as quickly as possible.

→ Related: 5 Signs You Might Need Counselling

What Happens at the Start

Your counsellor will usually begin by:

• Greeting you and creating a safe, respectful environment
• Explaining how confidentiality works (what is private and what isn’t)
• Asking if you have any questions before beginning

It’s more of a relaxed dialogue than a formal interview. You set the pace.

Talking About Why You Are Here

You’ll be gently invited to talk about what brought you in. You can share as much or as little as you want. Some clients arrive with a clear concern (like anxiety, grief, or burnout), while others simply feel “off” and want help making sense of it.

Setting Goals Together

Once your counsellor understands a bit more, you’ll often discuss what you’re hoping to get out of the process. Goals might include:

• Building coping tools
• Strengthening relationships
• Reducing anxiety or low mood
• Processing past trauma

→ Read: How Many Counselling Sessions Will I Need?

What If I Don’t Know What to Say

That’s okay. Counsellors are trained to gently guide the conversation. Most people feel a sense of relief just being able to speak openly — even if they’re not sure how to explain what they’re going through.

You don’t need to have the “right words.” You just need to show up.

What Happens After the First Session

Toward the end, you’ll talk about whether you’d like to continue. If you do, your counsellor may help you:

• Set a recurring time
• Explore deeper topics
• Adjust goals as needed over time

There’s no pressure. It’s your path, and you set the pace.

Looking for Counselling in Christchurch City

Ready to take that first step? We’re here to support you.
👉 Make a booking today for a counselling session

Overall Summary

Your first counselling session isn’t about fixing everything at once. It’s simply a safe place to begin — with honesty, openness, and zero judgment.

Whether you’re looking for clarity, support, or just someone to talk to, booking that first session can be a powerful act of self-respect.

Author: Noah Law

Noah Law is a writer and digital marketer with a background in hands-on trades. After spending five years working in the construction industry, Noah developed a deep understanding of service-based businesses—what makes them run, the challenges they face, and what clients truly value. Today, he combines real-world experience with sharp marketing insight to create content that helps local businesses grow, connect with their audience, and stand out online. Read more…

One of the most common questions people have before seeking therapy is, “How many will I need?” The answer is different for each person, but there are some things that can give you a sense of what to expect.

It Depends on Your Goals

The amount of sessions you’ll need in large part depends on what you’re looking to accomplish with counselling. If you wondering if you need counselling, read my article on 5 signs you might need counselling.

For example:

• If you require help with a specific issue (e.g., coping with stress or making a decision), short-term counselling could be enough—3 to 6 sessions.
• If you have more entrenched or long-term problems (e.g., anxiety, loss, or trauma), longer-term counselling might be more helpful—to the extent that you have regular sessions for months.
• If you have no idea what your goals are, your counsellor can help you discover them early on.

Everyone Works at Their Own Pace

There is no “right” number of sessions. A few work for some, and regular support along the way for others is useful.
How much you feel comfortable sharing, how long you’ve been experiencing the issue, and what’s happening in your life all play into this.

Most People Start Weekly

A good place to start is one session a week. This is long enough to have time to think between sessions, yet not so long as to make you lose energy.
At some later time, you may switch to fortnightly or monthly sessions, or complete altogether when you’re ready.

You Can Stop at Any Time

Counselling is your time and you’re in charge of how long you attend.
You’re never locked in. The majority of people will try a few sessions and then decide what works best for them.

Talk It Over With Your Counsellor

Your counsellor should be able to help you decide what is best for you. You can touch base with each other on a regular basis and adjust the plan along the way.

Final Thoughts

There isn’t one number of sessions that is perfect for everybody. It’s okay if you need more time—or less—than the next person. The most important thing is that you’re taking a step towards healing and support at your own pace. If you’re in Christchurch and would like in person counselling or would like an online session please enquire with over my website by clicking here.

There is nothing wrong with having tough times, but sometimes these challenges can start affecting your daily life, relationships, or overall health. Counselling is a space to figure out what is going on and find a solution in a safe, non-judgmental setting.
Here are five signals that you might need to speak with a counsellor:

1. You Feel Trapped or Overwhelmed

We all feel stressed sometimes, but if it feels like you’re always carrying around a burden on your shoulders, counselling can help.

You might notice:

• You can’t make a decision and feel stuck in your head
• Everything’s too much effort—even the minor things
• You don’t have a clue which way to turn in life
• You feel like you’re splashing about but achieving nothing

A counsellor can help you work through your ideas, explore what is holding you back, and develop a clearer path forward.

2. Your Feelings Seem Impossible to Tame

Our feelings are like flag signals—but when they’re getting out of hand, jumbled, or hard to manage, they may be flagging to you that it’s time to talk to someone.

You might be feeling:

• Suddenly changing mood or intense emotional reactions
• Feeling nervous, upset, or irritable without knowing why
• Emotional flatness or feeling disconnected from life
• Too much stress or tension that won’t go away

Counselling can give you skills to know and deal with your emotions so that you can approach life with more balance and ease.

3. You’re Pulling Away from Others

When things are not going well on the inside, we often start to pull away from the people surrounding us—even our loved ones.

You might be:

• Avoiding friends, family, or social events
• Losing interest in things that used to make you happy
• Feeling like nobody understands you
• Wanting to be alone too much

Counselling helps you look at these feelings, re-establishing contact, and feeling supported instead of isolated.

4. You’re Struggling with a Life Transition

Life transitions—planned or unplanned—can stir up strong emotions and leave you feeling off balance.

This might include:

• Breakup or divorce relationships
• Loss of job or career change
• Having a child or being an empty nester
• Loss or death
• Moving to a new residence or starting over

Talking about these changes with another person can help you process your emotions, adapt more easily, and find strength when the future is uncertain.

5. You Keep Repeating Unhealthy Patterns

If you notice the same issues repeating over and over again in your life, counselling can help you break the cycle.

You might notice:

• Repeating self-destructive relationship patterns
• Undermining your goals or progress
• Slipping into the same habits or coping strategies that fail
• Getting trapped in the same cycles of emotions (e.g., guilt, shame, resentment)

A counsellor may be able to help you recognize where these cycles are originating and how to create healthier, more empowering ones.

Final Thought

You don’t need to wait until things feel out of control to get help. Counselling is not only for crisis—it’s for healing, growth, and understanding yourself better. If any of these indicators ring true, calling could be the beginning of feeling better. If you’re looking for counselling in Christchurch/canterbury area enquire on my website by clicking here.